Each week Kelsey throws a “What to do?” spread for each of the zodiac signs. The first card is shown and the other two… well, you’ll just have to infer them from the written forecasts. Mind the heads up and have a lovely week!
Are you ready for the big payback, Aries? And do you expect that this big payback might necessitate an equal payout? I certainly hope so, as the week ahead sees a complete metamorphosis of your psychic economy. And by metamorphosis, I mean to indicate that your life tomorrow will look absolutely nothing like your life yesterday. You are not beholden to the past. So don’t let it hold you! Don’t be sad. Don’t be scared. Be fearless. Worry not about what you are leaving behind, but give yourself in full to this transubstantiation. It is your most cherished freedom, and it will bring you the greatest joy.
A shock in the mind is about to lull you out of any doldrums. Or has it already? Although your outside environment has certainly roused your consciousness to local abuses of power, an insight concerning violence and hierarchy is imminent. Let’s face it, Taurus — You’re all about stability. But when that “stability” is premised upon the manipulation and oppression of many, even you flip. This week, it’s time to assassinate a tyrant. It’s time for the many to overtake the few. It’s time for heterogeneity to swarm monoculture. And you? Well, you look set to get aggressively plural. Power to the people!
Parteeeeee, Gemini! Let go. Hang loose. Fall apart. But don’t complain when things get a little anarchic. And they will get a little anarchic, so… Better to see this as an almost shamanic experience that challenges your entire notion of property. And by “property” I mean what is proper to, what belongs where and why and how. As there is no state of sovereignty, as there is no position that is not necessarily a relation to an other, see the blurring of boundaries and ramshackle exchanges as an opportunity for creativity and the generation of new forms and values. Any loss can be mined for profit.
“Too much love makes you fat like a gangster” (Die Antwoord). Likewise, too much comfort, safety, and protection. But this is a week wherein you need to play to win, Cancer. So might I suggest that you sleep on the floor in preparation for combat and ultimate victory? If it’s frightening, new, revolutionary, uncontrollable, impassioned, then hop to and fall in. A window has opened upon an alternative universe and you are being invited to crawl through. Please do. For where you’ve felt like a loser, you’ll suddenly find that you can win.
Accounts need to be settled and contracts honored. You know this. So, what’s with the delay, Leo? Try as you might to move forward with an exchange, you seem to be getting yourself more entangled, confused, and hurt. Did you consult a wise woman as I suggested last week? It hardly matters now, as there’s a vital piece of information that remains hidden from your view. The cards suggest, however, that you may discover it in stillness and silence, so your increased entanglement might ultimately do you some good, if only to slow you down. This week, should inertia creep… let it!
This is a week of healing, Virgo. A week of pulling back, of laying low, of avoiding extremes. Although you rarely get credit for your preternatural creativity, you have more often than not found yourself in the hot seat for your strident views and mercurial fecundity. You’re like a lone tree that grows many fruit at unpredictable intervals, a biological outrage to mediocrity! And that’s fine… Generally. But this week, allow yourself to take cover in your own multifarious arbor and shade yourself from the limelight. You deserve and need the downtime.
Sometimes the most independent thing that you can do is to hang back. Sometimes the most strident stand you can make is to sit down. Or maybe take a bubble bath. Or a nap. You catch my drift, Libra. After all the reversals and upheaval your life has so recently seen, you’re in need of a vacation. And you’re entitled to it. So put your foot down and put on some PJs with footsies. Although the world will not cease rap upon your doors and windows this week, you can safely close the shades, put in some earplugs, and hit the snooze button. The world will still be there when you are good and ready.
Refrain from judgment, Scorpio. Refrain from “knowing,” in the Western sense. Instead, trust your bodies (psychic, physical…whatever) and feel your way through the week. Slither and sidewind in accordance with that most mysterious emotional call within. Allow your comfort to carry you. Recall previous masteries and permit them to propel you forward. Trust your own second nature and give it its due primacy. The days to come stand to be the most luxurious you have experienced in many years. But they must be experienced, felt; they cannot be thought. So if you think this week, make sure you use your entire organism, environment included… Better: feel.
Sometimes you need to withdraw. And sometimes there’s no real reason “why.” Let yourself be OK with the unexplainable and temporary retreat, and encourage those closest to you to be OK with it, too. It really isn’t a cause for concern and need not be explained or justified — you couldn’t even if you wanted to — but it should certainly be honored. You’re allowed some alone time, Sadge. It doesn’t signify the end of a relationship. It doesn’t mean that you take your rich community for granted. It just means that you really need to chill. That’s OK. So give yourself the week to get what you need for yourself. You need to press pause, not stop.
You’re out of your league, Capricorn. And yet how you yearn to wage battle! You’re practically salivating for the chance to ‘let you-know-who’ have a ‘what-to.’ But they will bury you if you try. Might I suggest that you train first? Maybe start your own club for the overthrow of ‘you-know-who?’ Take an ad out in your local paper for like-minded equals looking to grow stronger together, in faux combat, before taking on your shared oppressor? I daresay that if you set your sights towards becoming the equal of your opponent in talent, strength, creativity, and experience, you may find that you’re no longer at loggerheads. But by all means, go ahead and call it “The Revenge Club” to start.
You’re in danger of trying to be too fair, Aquarius. Odd, I know, but it’s actually a failure of your own imagination. You see, you’re trading apples for pony rides with the pony, and if the pony is super hungry, well, who the hell are you to try to reason with that? At worst, someone who will soon have a dead pony. At best, someone trying to reason with a famished pony. No exchange is constant and consistent. If it was, it wouldn’t be an exchange at all. It would be static. So go with the flow and follow the warmest and softest part inside of you. Find joy in pleasing your pony and your pony will only add to that joy.
Sure, you could start from scratch. But would that really be an intelligent use of your resources, Pisces? Might you, in fact, just be showing off? Pulling a laborious abracadabra with no assistant might make you feel cool, but you’d look a fool to me. Particularly in light of the help that is on offer to you this week. An assistant — nay, a master! — who is willing to furnish you with intelligent feedback and trade secrets. So yes, while you certainly could reinvent the wheel, why not get together with a fellow specialist and build a hot rod? Or better, something for which we as yet have no name. Start smart, have help, and cull from tradition. Invention is only ever a side effect.
Last Week’s Word to the Wise: April 3, 2014