Word to the Wise: Week of March 14, 2013

Each week, Kelsey throws a “What to do?” spread for each of the zodiac signs.  The first card is shown and the other two… well, you’ll just have to infer them from the written forecasts.  Mind the heads up and have a lovely week!



You’ve been fantasizing about reconciliation with a special someone for quite some time, and this week, the opportunity finally arrives.   Sounds great, right?  What could possibly go wrong?   Well, that’s a real question, Aries…  You have some ‘splaining to do.  And even if you think you don’t strictly have to explain yourself, I’m here to tell you — you do.  You’re not turning over a new leaf with this person if the entire basis of the renewed relation are lies by omission or “white” lies in the hopes that sleeping dogs lie.  If you don’t awaken those dogs and boot them off the property en toto, they will most definitely awaken and attack you at the most painfully inopportune time.  What is more, it will further hurt the person with whom you’re so keen to reconcile.  Tell them the strictest truth now and make your honesty the basis of what is to come.  Trusting this person to forgive is a risk, sure.  But you risk far more if you don’t voluntarily come clean while you still can.


You’re in a holding pattern at work, Taurus, and concern over your next move is keeping you up late nights.  Be very wary that the holding pattern doesn’t turn into a mise en abîme.   What’s that I say?  Get some sleep and give yourself a break!  You.  Are.  Fine.  Although you don’t yet have all the information and/or agency to make your next grand career move, fretting and losing sleep will neither help you now nor in the future.   So quit haranguing yourself and unbend.  The situation will develop on its own, and when it does, you need to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed so as to follow your most innocent and vibrant hope.  We’re talking fresh inspiration and child-like glee.  You will feel it quite naturally as the situation ripens.  Until then, be kind to yourself and trust that something beautiful is developing — something beautiful which does not yet need your attention at the moment!  Exhale.



It’s high time you separated the wheat from the chaff, Gemini.  Your situation is delicate, I ain’t gonna lie.  But if any sign can be cold-hearted and clinical enough to handle the uncomfortable game of Operation in which you seem to be embroiled, it’s you.  This is a very nifty capacity of yours, and one you really need to keep in the forefront and at the ready.  On the one hand, a rigged fight has reached its unjust climax (chaff).  On the other hand, there’s a creative kernel — which arose directly  from the aforementioned farce — that you need to seize and hold tight (wheat).  Tend to this creative kernel, labor upon it, and it will ripen into a new career and/or financial gain.  Promise.  To help you get through,  go ahead and put on some psychological blinders to keep you focused on your project and out of the dead-end conflict, set your desktop background to The Gleaners, and know that I, for whatever it’s worth, have faith in you and your talents.  You can handle this!


Hey, sweet Cancer.  Are you familiar with the phrase: “Better the devil you know”?  Well, I’m here to tell you that’s horse shit — most probably propaganda spawned by Satan’s very own P.R. team.  You’re stuck in a copper-plated cage and it’s taking on that predictable, unhealthy, green patina.  Fly out and away!  I know that the past has been hair-raising, to say the least, and that your resources seem meager.  But that doesn’t mean it’s more prudent to sit tight and hold steady in a situation that is making you miserable.  It’s time to wrap your belongings in a kerchief, tie it to the end of a stick, and announce that you’re leaving this sad-sack situation for now and all eternity.  A whole world of glistening unknowns awaits you.  Do what frightens you!  Move toward it, in it, and through it.  The journey won’t let you down.  I suggest you start packing now…


All of the sudden, interest picks up on a creative project that is completely kaput.  I can’t imagine anything more irritating, Leo.  But the fact is, you’ve already turned the page and moved on.  So, what are you going to do with the superfluity of looky-loos?  Ignore them?  Or soak up on their notoriously short-lived attention and affection before making a run for the hills?  How about neither.  Instead, be direct, honest, and to the point.  You may wish to pique their interest in the future, so if you end this untimely dalliance on clean and kindly terms they may well return at a more appropriate date.  Go on — practice in the mirror.  Smile politely, and then say: “I appreciate your interest, but there’s really nothing to see here, folks!”  You want more than a flash in a rusted-out, old pan.  Speak the truth, bide your time, and keep their contact info for future reference.  You’ll be glad you did!


You’re still the underdog, Virgo, but you’re holding your ground ever so admirably.  That’s good, as you’ve gained more turf than you may yet realize.  That does not mean that your past gains have gone unnoticed by others.  Indeed, one other in particular — an other who has more power and clout than you — and may very well see you as a threat.  Yikes!  What to do?  Kill ’em with kindness if you must engage at all.  And chances are, you must.  You’ve got mad heart power at the moment and a  supportive community that genuinely wants to see you succeed.   Your rival does not!  They’ve got a gaggle of sycophants.  Ugh.  Shore up your gains, love those who love you, and if a stand-off should occur, take aim with the ooey-gooey and let ‘er rip.  Your opponent won’t stand a chance.


You’re bored, Libra.  Reeaaally, reeaaally bored!  Ironically, a super sweet loved one is to blame, as they’ve got you all hemmed in, over pleasured, and dare I say it?  Over loved! You’re a prisoner of luxury and loyalty.  Sure, it sounds nice, in theory… but the reality is, this type of glut is best guarded as fantastic.  No want means no desire.  No desire means no feeling.  No feeling means anhedonia.  And anhedonia means “good lord, what’s the point?!”  You’re about to have all your love loved right out of you if you don’t make a run for it while you still can.  You need fresh air and fresh faces.  Am I suggesting a clean break?  No.  That would be silly.  But you need at least two new projects to have a compelling juggling act.  And artful juggling — well, that’s where you really shine.


Good news comes your way but you just couldn’t care less.  What gives, Scorpio?  Well, you may feel that you’ve so many new people around you, you might as well be at a barn dance.  And let’s be real, there must be at least one ring of Hell reserved for torture by do-si-do and promenade.  Who can blame you for wanting to crawl into a hole, instead?  You may also be feeling hurt or let down by others, so the good news just feels like way too little, way too late.  I suggest you don’t decide just yet and instead throw yourself into a project that might stand to earn you some cash.  I know it doesn’t sound very “enlightened,” but this week a nose to the grindstone mentality might be your best shot at a productive peace of mind.  You can return to the good news when you know how you really feel.  But to the extent that you’re just not feeling much of anything, delay in the workaholic’s way.  Your feelings will quicken when they’re good and ready.


It seems to be heartbreak season for you, Sadge.  I said “seems.”  By stressing appearances and your own subjectivity, I don’t mean to devalue the fact that you’ve received some serious ouchies of late.   But part of the reason they might hurt so bad is that you’re in a rather liberated and luxurious position.  That’s to say, you’re in such excellent condition in so many respects that you can really feel every single little prick.  What to do?  Oddly, the answer is to shore up your resources and set yourself to getting more of the good stuff — more luxe, more communal stability, and more opportunities for physical advancement.  Your theme song for the week is “Season of the Witch,” and there’s a lesson in that.  You need to try to let the pain spin your mind just enough to see the possibilities within your current, rather fecund predicament.  This really is a subjectivity game.  You’re quite safe — go ahead and play with it!


Woo!  Looks like this week is one long party with your name all over it!  Not feeling it, Capricorn?  I’m not surprised.  Your workaholic ways are seriously gumming up your quality of life.  I know, you think you’ve got oodles and oodles to do and if you, personally, don’t handle all of it, the whole world will come tumbling down.  Ahem… as a citizen of the world, it’s my pleasure to inform you that me and the rest of the zodiac gang can handle the world without you this week.  Go off and be a dumb, goofy teenager again.  Seriously.  You’re not that secret mortar holding us all together and it’s sorta rude that you should even fancy yourself so.  You’ve got a wicked poverty complex that won’t be solved with more labor.  You need to unbend, celebrate plenitude, and have fun already.  The world will spin without you and you won’t go broke if you stop earning.  Get over yourself, please — and indulge!


You’re adrift, Aquarius.  It’s true.  But the endless barrage of over-intellectual criticism, either coming from yourself or another, is certainly not making matters any better.  Or is it?  Could it be that the mean-spirited, control-maniac drivel that is browbeating you from within and/or without is, in point of fact, your paradoxical anti-homing beacon?  Could it be repelling you so thoroughly that it prompts you to leave a stale situation and enter new, uncharted waters?  Yes, it could.   Let that ugliness push you away from it!  And how will you know when to start charting a more positive path?  You’ll know.  But it won’t be your brain that tells you so much as a heart that calls to you.  Until then, go ahead and be adrift.  Just make sure you paddle away from the hyper-analytical negativity.


If there was ever a doubt, let there be none now — you are indeed a heavy-hitter, Pisces.  But, as with all virtues, you need to be vigilant that your incredible strength isn’t your ultimate downfall.   There’s a danger that you might get stuck in a generic productivity loop.  So, how do you avoid it?  Take a page from Carol Channing… Obviously!  Here’s what she says about the trap of the public self and self-imitation:  “When you try to talk about yourself, you don’t know who you are, or what you’re like, or what you’re like to other people.  And the moment you do it’s a formula for yourself, and then you’re imitating yourself, and then nobody likes you and they don’t know why.”  Don’t let this happen to you!  If you want to stay in your power, stay out of your comfort zone.  To the extent that you don’t know exactly what you’re like, you’re creative offerings will continue to be fresh and loved by so, so many.


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